Learning to cope with failures

Failure - a word we all so very detest but seem to come face to face with it, quite a few times in our lives. Occasionally confronting this negative phenomenon is okay, but what happens when kids counter it, repeatedly? These are the times when the strength of their characters are put to test. One who comes victorious in times when chips are down, is a winner in true sense.

Kids and even adults cannot avoid failures but they can definitely minimize the occurrences by following few steps. It is very important to encounter this phenomenon in the very first instance. Failures can take many forms- failure to get good grades in subjects, to get selected in the school soccer team, to learn swimming or even to win friends. Whatever the cause may be, the answers lie within you only.

Failures upset me

They surely do. In fact, they may also wreak havoc at times, but you should never allow them to overpower you. You may feel like crying when faced with such a situation. Do not bottle up your emotions; cry as much as you want to, but then put the whole episode behind you and start afresh.

I put in so much of hard work, still I don’t make it

It is possible that kids are not able to make the grades in spite of working very hard. There could be several reasons for the same. You would have worked hard but not as hard as the job required you to. It is also possible that the task that you are trying to accomplish is not in tandem with your innate talents. For example, you may be trying too hard to learn piano but are not able to do so satisfactorily, but if you channelize the same amount of effort to painting, you do wonders. Whenever you try to excel in any activity, mull on your natural talents first.

I’m tired of struggling

You may feel the same if you are confronted with disappointments, time and again. Here again, you have to introspect the reasons for your failures and try to rectify them.

I’m not successful because of others

This is the worst pep talk you can give yourself. Blaming others for your own misdeeds will not bring you success. Believing that the negative outcome of your efforts is because of other people, will make you a habitual failure as you would not accept the reality and correct the factors responsible.

I don’t think I can ever make it

Successive disappointments may make you think like this. This is dangerous because once kids are convinced that they cannot make it, no power in the world can make it happen for them.

Few things that will help you ...

- Resilience is essential

Nobody in this world tastes success without tasting failures and so, you are not the only own one going through the drill. Do not give up, at the very first taste of defeat.

- Learning from your mistakes

Each mistake of yours has some lesson for you. Perhaps you didn’t follow certain strictures or you simply lazed around and watched television when you should have been studying hard. When you fail, take some time to introspect on the probable reasons and give special attention to them, in your next attempt. Remember life does not always give you second chances, and so do not make failures your habit.

- Do not be over confident

Confidence is good but an overdose of the same would mar your chances of success.

- Never underestimate your opponent

Competition is getting tougher by the day and everybody tries to put in his or her best in each activity. Give your best shot to every attempt even if you feel you are pitted against a weak opponent.

- Read and listen to inspirational stories

The earlier you learn to cope with failures, the better for you. Always dwell on the activity and not on the result. If you work hard and try to give your best always, nobody can take success away from you.